Healthy relaxed hair tips, building a routine.

With this new revelation that relaxed hair is the way for me I started to rethink my routine. If I am going to become a committed chemical user then I wanted to do it well. I also had to think about how to keep my hair slippery and free from tangles. I have learned a few things in this last year about my chemically treated hair that I would like to share.

I now wash my hair in the sink, not the shower. For years I have been untangling my hair in the shower with plenty of conditioner from scalp to tip. That has caused mechanical breakage due to the wet tension and over stretched my hair weakening it as well as irritation because my scalp hates conditioner. I have sensitive skin and I barely use anything on it, I now do the same for my scalp. I now untangle my hair, plait three ways, shampoo with a sulfate free conditioner and then condition the last two thirds of my hair under a plastic cap for at least an hour. I rinse very well in the sink losing no hair as it has already been removed  when untangling and then finally add a watery leave in conditioner and pour olive oil on the center of my scalp and smooth down to the tips of my hair.

I have started to use Extra Virgin Olive Oil on the ends of my hair to keep it lubricated and to condition my scalp after washing. I have discovered that that not all EVOO is equal, some brands are too light for my hair, but my favorite so far is the unfiltered bottle of Fillipo Berio that I picked up in Waitrose for 3.99. There is a liter of it and because its unfiltered it contains more body and a bit if sedament. It also works in my daughters fine 3C hair.

I have also started to roller set under a warm bonnet and blow dry on warm occasionally with no ill effect. This was a sort of evolution of sorts, as when I flat ironed my hair and  I realised that I really did not like to do something that I knew would leave my hair dry and split in a couple of days. I really enjoy roller setting but it takes me about 48 hours to dry it naturally and sleeping on them gives me a headache so I use my bonnet on cool for about and hour and pin curl the areas that may be damp. I use my leave in and a little silicone or even better olive oil and the result is lovely heavy hair, full of moisture. I like my hair to be in large waves which suits my love of vintage style but I also would like to experiment with the large purple rollers. Problem is that my hair is so dense that I need a few packs for the job, storage is a problem as I seem to have a lot of rollers, my kids love to play with them.

I also blow dry my hair  wet, I always thought I should air dry first to about 80% but the Science of Black Hair  taught me to use water content  as an additional buffer against heat damage. So now I squeeze out the moisture with a towel and then add a leave in and a silicone blow dry gently on cool with a paddle brush. I keep the blow dryer concentrator nozzle a few inches away from my hair, once dry I seal my hair with some EVOO as I want to stop my ends from being crunchy. They are usually a little damp as I do not dry them completely and I like my ends to be to be lubricated and free from tangles.

I no longer avoid from silicone as its a great at protecting my hair from damage and helps stop tangles from forming. This means I do not have to invest in expensive silicone free conditioners, I am not doing the curly girl method anyway so why avoid silicone? Even the strongest one can be washed away with sulfates.

I have realised that I am protein sensitive, I love hard protein and now use it every other week or I do a henna treatment. However I can not use light proteins as my regular conditioner and there are so many of them out there. Finding a leave in has been testing due to the fact that the companies make leave in conditioner for people with damaged hair and so they contain protein. I can only use a protein twice a week tops and if I seal with coconut oil my hair is rigid the next day.

In fact I now see my extra virgin coconut oil as a protein sealant and my extra virgin olive oil as a moisturising sealant. Its very important that I remember this when I am choosing my oils before I go to be or I will end up with difficult hair in the morning. I also use shea butter as a creamy moisturiser on damp hair but it has so be sealed with EVOO to take away the waxy finish that can leave my hair a little dull. I am allergic to caster oil, it makes my scalp break out and become sore, horrible as its a fantastic lubricant,

So my last relaxer was on the 20th November 2011, I had washed and deep conditioned with nexxus emergencee and Humectress, and then air dried in a bun. On the night of the 19th I pretreated my ends with olive oil, this left my hair easy to part in the morning.  After applying ORS Lye in normal strength with an applicator brush starting at the crown, I smoothed lightly and rinsed in the sink then used the last of my ORS hair mayonaise as a mid relaxer protein treatment. Conditioners have a lower ph than relaxer so the neutralising process had already begun (see science of black hair book) I left the protein on for about ten minutes, then rinsed, used my ORS neutralising shampoo and then deep conditioned with the last of my humectress for an hour. The result was fantastic, I am closer to bra strap and when I dried my hair it was heavy and full of moisture, I can not remember when my hair was this long or healthy.

So I am trying to stick to what I know to avoid buying too many products, I recently had a big clear out.  I am however having some problems finding the perfect moisturiser other than water so I have decided to try Joico Daily Care detangling leave in as it was on special offer on amazon. Nexxus has a brilliant moisturiser but it only comes in 300ml that is not enough for the twelve pound price. Joico was twelve pounds for 1000ml on special offer! I am also on the look out for a new deep moisture conditioner as Humectress says leave on for three minutes and I need hardcore moisture. It just does not work for me the instructions should say ten minutes or longer. So next I am going to try Joico moisture recovery balm and I managed to get 500ml quite cheap and apparently a little goes a long way. I will do a review on these products as soon as I ave given them a good trial.

Well I hope this helps somebody, I feel my hair journey that has been almost a decade now I finally turning a corner and I can see long hair at the end of the tunnel. I think 2012 will be a good year :-)

Accepting that relaxer is your styling choice.

Friends, I recently came to an important conclusion, I have tried to stop relaxing my hair and I have tried every technique but in the end I have come to the conclusion that my indecision is literally ruining my hair. Looking after anything requires patience and consistency, and changing your regime every few weeks is the complete opposite of what you need to grow your hair long and strong. I have been so all over the place jumping on every band wagon going and believing every hype that I read about that this year and as a result I have experienced some breakage and thinning that I can see that I can pin point back to transitioning or stretching my relaxer for too long, using to much heat trying to "heat train" my new growth.

My thick, course and dense hair hides the damage well and I am still on my way to bra strap despite all my changes, but I have seen the most growth in the last four months when I started taking it easy on my hair and swore off anything more than dusting my ends. You see, my hair is damaged and cutting off that damage will give me instant relief but, I think my ends will always have a certain amount of damage so I might as well learn to manage it rather than cutting it off. Its just so demotivating to grow your hair and then chop off three inches, that is four to six months growth.

My previous relaxer was in September after a four month stretch, I thought that I was transitioning but with my hair gaining length I really wanted to enjoy it. I avoided heat, especially my flat iron as I noticed that it made my new growth very dry which eventually leads to breakage. My hair was feeling strong and after some encouragement from a friend I took the plunge and relaxed using Organic Root Stimulator's lye relaxer. I was really pleased with the results but I had this strong feeling of failure and guilt, I deleted my blog in shame. All I could think was why can't I transition am I ashamed of my natural beauty, do I have issues with how God made me?

I started to research relaxer addiction on the internet....and then I came to my senses, I was not addicted to relaxer, I just love to where my textured hair straight. My hair does not look European, Asian, or otherwise. My hair looks like what it is, course, chemically straightened hair, its unique in its own right and its beautiful. Its me, just like I love to wear the colour red and form fitting dresses, its  a part of my personal style and I should not feel ashamed.